Welcoming a child into your home is a very courageous act that I believe is one of the most heart-warming and personal ways to make a direct difference in a child’s life. Very often, children who are in need of a safe place, are placed with carers who are of a different race, and possibly culture or ethnicity to them. Some carers might feel that all they need to do is to provide a safe space with food, love and support for education, medical, contact etc. While that is definitely the foundation of what is needed, there are so many voices and evidence that echo, that in an inter-racial/-cultural/-ethnic placement, a little more is needed.
If we think of our own identity, what it means to us, and how it shaped and continues to shape how we interact with other people and the world, we can start to get a small glimpse of how important identity is to a growing and developing child, and how important it is to nurture and celebrate their identity and their roots. This task might sound large or overwhelming to some, but let me explain how simple it can be, and in my practice as a social worker, I have seen so many beautiful examples of families embracing and encouraging a child’s roots that is different from their own.
Embracing a child’s roots can be as simple as doing some of the following things:
- Doing some research about the child’s culture and telling them about it. You can even incorporate it into playtime and story-time (for younger children) or make it a fun project for older children where you can make a collage together and collate the information and learn together. You could even play age-appropriate YouTube video’s for them to learn more.
- Learning about the child’s race/culture/ethnicity’s cuisine: researching some recipes and incorporating this into a few meals of your own home cooking. You can ask the child to help you (age-appropriately).
- If the child has language roots that is different from yours, you could learn the child’s native language with them if you wish to, or help them to learn it, or arrange some language/tutoring classes for them should they wish to do these. It can be a lovely bonding exercise to learn a language together and it will never be wasted as you and the child will be able to use it, even if it is at a very basic level. It is something to be mindful of, that if the child’s birth parents can only speak their native language and it is different to your native language, that you make it an extra priority for the child to learn their native language (if they are young and not fluent already) so that they can communicate with their birth parents/family.
- Celebrate traditional days of the child’s culture with them. You can do research on these and plan them out in advance. If special food or clothing is needed, you can make provision for these in advance and speak to your Supervising Social Worker as there is extra provision made for these special celebrations.
These are a few ideas, and we would love it if you can add anything you might have done or thought of in the comment section.
It is important to be mindful, aware and considerate of the fact that there are some children who might not want to connect with their roots if they had a particularly bad experience or were mistreated by people of those roots and have made a decision that they wish to disconnect. We should always be child-focused and act in the best interest of a child. Therefore, one can whole-heartedly gauge where the child is at and whether they wish to connect to these roots. It is always best to start where the child is and follow their wishes in this regard. Some children might never want to reconnect with their roots, and others might want to reconnect at a later stage. Always stay open, curious and loving in this respect.
We hope this was helpful! Let us know your thoughts. For any guidance and direction, you can always speak to your Supervising Social Worker.
By Marissa Venter – Senior Social Worker
