When your child’s language comes off as unfriendly, rude, or unkind, it’s important to avoid labelling them with phrases like, “You are so rude!” There are many reasons a child might behave in a way that seems disrespectful. For one, they may not realize how their behaviour is coming across – and this can happen for a variety of reasons.
Your child may be reacting out of fear or anger, mimicking behaviour they’ve seen elsewhere, or simply feeling safe enough with you to express strong emotions, even if they don’t do it in the best way.
That said, dealing with rudeness is tough, and staying calm in the moment isn’t always easy. Responding emotionally – such as by saying how hurt you feel – might not be the most effective way to guide your child. Instead, here are six things you can say to encourage more respectful communication while still validating their feelings.
6 Things to Say When Your Child Is Being Rude or Unkind
- “I understand that you’re upset, but it’s not okay to speak to me like that. Let’s talk about what’s bothering you in a nicer way.”
- “Let’s take a moment to calm down. I want to listen, but I need you to speak calmly and respectfully.”
- “It’s important to express how you feel, but being disrespectful isn’t okay. Let’s pause and find a better way to talk about it.”
- “I’m happy to help, but I need you to ask kindly. Can you try again?”
- “It hurts people when you speak like that. Can you say it in a kinder way?”
- “We talk to each other with respect. How can we work this out without being rude?”
These responses model respectful communication while helping your child reflect on their words.
Over time, they’ll learn how to express themselves more appropriately – and you’ll strengthen your relationship in the process.
Adapted from Mom.ma.g on Instagram https://www.facebook.com/reel/422767650793044
